Sunday, April 28, 2013

NPC Emerald Cup - 5 days out

So I'm 5 days out. Today I did legs. Just a few supersets, 3 x 20 major exercises to burn out the glycogen. No carbs in my diet now aside from what's in all the asparagus I'm eating to drop water. I've made some HUGE changes and progress and I'm super excited about that. It's funny people's interpretations or views on that. Some people think that people who make changes like that are on steroids or other things. Ignorance. Jealousy because they are not making their own progress. Probly eating way too many carbs and/or drinking. But also everyone has their own opinions. Yesterday a friend told me that the big buff tatted dude at the booth next to us said I was 'jacked'. haha SuhWEET! I don't always see it. I mean I do in the selfies when I'm posing but never sure how I look to others. Today I saw a colleague who hadn't seen me in months, since like 20lbs ago, and she was like 'you got skinny! what' going on?" And I told her I had a show on Friday lol. So as if you're not already going back and forth in your own head, you have all these different opinions being thrown at you.
I'm also chugging a TON of water! 1-2 gallons a day. And I'm still THIRSTY!!! This is the effect different foods and ratios have on the body. I wouldn't recommend trying it, just take my word for it ;) 
This is me a few days ago. Lots of progress. My back is my best feature and its starting to show. The lighting in this locker room is horrible and has not reflecting what I and others have actually seen in my progress but it is what it is. Quad separation is good, shoulders are more capped then before. I'm still crooked, yes I AM, not the suit or how I'm standing. Chest has more definition,...I've really been working on that and finally have a pec separation. Also a lot less boobs, HAHHA! They are 'manageable' now.  
So everyone thinks I look Awesome and I'm 'gonna win'. It's really hard to be nice and take a compliment when you know it's not true. THIS is my weak spot. And despite all my progress, and how lean everything else is getting, THIS CRAP is still there. I am embarrassed by these photos. 'Normal people' don't know how ROUGH the competition is, and yes, every little line needs to be where it should. So do I feel confident? lol nope.  
 
This is not the bootie of a Figure Competitor. Again, the lighting is awful and I'm not tanned, but still. Yes, there will be improvement as I drop my water and dry out. I will tighten up, but not to the extent I need to. But I have to remember my approach this time. Although I REALLY wanted this show, I also wanted BALANCE. I allowed cheat meals. I had a little flexibility. Because I KNOW I can diet like crazy. But I also know I can balloon back up quickly. And I do not want that. I don't want the mental struggle and rebound I usually have. So the loss of over 20lbs was almost painless to me. I dieted, yes. But I feel like when I made changes the weight came off. And I enjoyed my food. I'd rather be a lower trophy and be able to maintain it all year round than to win one show and gain 30lbs back after that.

It's ok. The work is done, the final stages are in place. I'm getting caught up on rest these next few days and prepping and packing. Sara and I will enjoy this adventure to WA together and then hang out in Seattle and enjoy food like normal people lol. I'm already thinking to my diet and training for the next two months as NPC San Jose is on June 29th. All I really need to do is tighten up and drop a few more lbs or gain a lil muscle. I can come in very lean. And I have  few special events planned already for my cheat meals. If I keep it tight I should be able to allow them and then I will have something that I can start to live with as a normal life.

No comments:

Post a Comment